Think Good Thoughts
Hell week is over. Good bye, Midterms!
They see something in you that is real.
Let them understand you."
come to think of it
I am not entirely sure
where I lost myself
maybe it was in those
eight hours of class time
lost in notes and due dates
equations and definitions
in beds of strangers or
old friends who I no longer
know the whereabouts of
was it in love, or lost?
perhaps in written words
Your mother will occasionally peek through the cracks of your door when you are sleeping, even now, to make sure that she can see the movements of your chest.
The boy who kissed you in the park last night isn’t in love with you, he won’t even stay, but he meant every second of those minutes.
You’ll walk a city street that your feet have never touched before and you’ll be terrified of getting lost and that feeling is what’ll help you find the way home.
You’ll give your money to a homeless man and he will hold your hand firmly between his and he will say ‘thank you so, so much’ and isn’t that something?
There’s a piece of music that makes your heart feel like it’s bleeding. Listen to it. Listen to it again.
When was the last time you paused to stare at night time?
Did you know that there is at least one person in your life who will jump in front of a hail of bullets for you, without your asking.
Your entire body is made of nerves. Feel things.
Take walks in places you’ve never been.
Take photographs of people not everyone considers beautiful. Find loveliness in them.
Let go of the things that are killing you from the inside out.
One day you’re going to be part of the sky, you’re going to be that beautiful and that necessary but not today. Not today."
1. I will kiss girls who remind me of Ophelia and boys why remind me of Holden Caulfield I will lick their sadness off of their lips and spit it to the pavement I will not swallow it maybe I will text them back the next morning
2. I will talk to someone new every day I am living in a beehive of adolescence a 1,000 page bildungsroman squeezed into a grassy campus I will listen to all the stories I can fit into my brain when it overflows I will go to sleep and try again tomorrow
3. I will fall in love with that tall, thin girl with newly died strawberry hair who I ate ice cream with under a tree, with the blonde girl with athlete’s shoulders and a swoop of apathy under one eye who grew beans in a greenhouse that she designed with 3D printing software, with the tiny old woman who works in the psychology department and who looked at me like a pearl in an oyster when I told her I loved cognitive science, with the boy who wondered aloud why everyone is always following a path and then proceeded to run barefoot down a grassy hill even though he had no idea where he was going. A year from now I will love them all, right now I don’t even know their names.
4. I will learn the names of all the constellations and the wildflowers and the bugs and ducks and snails I will impress people with how beautiful the world is and I will teach them that sometimes being part of this earth means picking up an almanac, means asking questions like “what’s that beetle called?”
5. I will read hungrily everything assigned and recommended to me
6. I will do the typical college things: I will funnel beer I will question my existence I will sleep through class I will change my ideologies I will disappoint my parents I will start an underground movement I will buy cheap vodka I will buy and old military jacket I will buy forgiveness I will liberate myself I will wonder who I am I will funnel beer"
―six goals for my first year of college (via porn4smartgirls)
―Assata Shakur (via natashakills)